I keep threatening people with it, saying: “I’ve left you Big Fella in my will.” A look of horror appears on their faces. I worry a lot about who will inherit Big Fella if I pop my clogs. I say it to Big Fella, and then I get myself ready and go to work and sit on reception smiling at everyone. I wake up and say: “Christ, I’m in agony this morning.” No one else needs to know that. No matter how bad the pain is, I always say good morning to Big Fella when I wake up.
Everyone is going about their business and you have this thing hanging over you.
Having cancer is like living in a parallel universe. When I was diagnosed with stage four prostate cancer in 2014, Big Fella came into his own. Everyone who comes to my house gets a photo with Big Fella. My favourite bear is a 6ft-tall Charlie bear that I call Big Fella. I pass out thinking about how much money I’ve spent on them – probably £20,000 over my lifetime. I have about 60 Steiff and Charlie Bears. When I grew up, I started collecting teddy bears. That sounds very traumatic, but it wasn’t that bad. I used to cart Brumas everywhere with me – until one day his head fell off. He was named after the famous polar bear who was born into captivity at London zoo. It all started when my uncle won me a big old bear called Brumas, when I was about five. ‘I’ve probably spent about £20,000 over my lifetime’ … Jeff Annells with members of his 60-strong teddy bear collection.
